36 weeks: A Daddy's Prayer. March 26, 2013

 March 26th 2013 = 36 weeks pregnant! I am blown away by how fast this pregnancy is moving. This time next month, we will have a sweet baby boy, by the name of Tucker Frank Mills, snuggled in our arms, radically warming our hearts, and forever changing our lives. We have been so blessed throughout the past 9 months, that I just get so overwhelmed thinking about God's grace. He has provided for us in more ways than we ever could have imagined. He deserves all of the glory and honor and praise for everything we have and everything we are.

Today, we also honor and remember my wonderful and incredible dad. On March 26th, 2005, he was delivered by the grace of God from his battle with cancer, and set free to spend eternity with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.



Oh, how I would give anything in the world to see his face, see his smile, hug and squeeze my arms around him, and show him my growing belly. I have no doubt whatsoever, that he would be the MOST proud papaw in the world. It again, gives me such great joy knowing that we already have a little angel in Heaven, probably talking his papaw's ears off! I don't know where that trait would come from, but it's just my gut feeling that our first baby was/is a talker =)

My dad still holds more clout and respect in my heart than any other man in this world. He set the standard way above par for the husband that I wanted and would not otherwise settle for. I believe with all my heart that my dad loved Todd just as one of his own sons. 

On his last day on earth, I believe he had complete peace in his heart letting go of me as his daughter, and letting Todd take my hand in marriage. Although he wasn't able to be at the wedding, my mom says he seemed perfectly content once all was said and done; he knew his little girl would be well taken care of. 

With his last breath, he told my mom he loved her, then immediately stood before the throne of the Most High King. In my earthly mind, I can't imagine what that must have been like, but I am so hopeful that my last days and my last breath on this earth are with my family surrounded near me, holding my hand as I take the next step into eternity as my dad did. 

A few months ago, my mom gave me this newspaper clipping that my dad had cut out and had kept in his Bible ever since learning they would become parents. I now have it in my own Bible, right beside his picture, our first baby's ultrasound photo, and the newspaper announcement of our marriage. 

A Parent's Prayer

"O Heavenly Father, make me a better parent. Teach me to understand my children, to listen patiently to what they have to say, and to answer all their questions kindly. Keep me from interrupting them or contradicting them. Make me as courteous to them as I would have them be to me. Forbid that I should ever laugh at their mistakes, or resort to shame or ridicule when they displease me. May I never punish them for my own selfish satisfaction or to show my power.

Let me not tempt my child to lie or steal. And guide me hour by hour that I may demonstrate by all I say and do that honesty produces happiness. Reduce I pray, the meanness in me. And when I am out of sorts, help me, O Lord, to hold my tongue. May I ever be mindful that my children are children and I should not expect of them the judgment of adults. Let me not rob them of the opportunity to wait on themselves and make decisions.

Bless me with the bigness to grant them all their reasonable requests, and the courage to deny them privileges I know will do them harm. Make me fair and just and kind. And fit me, O Lord, to be loved and respected and imitated by my children. Amen."



Today, we also celebrate eight incredible years of marriage. I never knew I could be so blessed to marry this man, and I wouldn't change ANYTHING we've experienced together. The good and bad, the ups and downs, the struggles and victories, the pain of loss and the joy of new life. Each experience has made us so much stronger in our faith, our love for our Lord, our marriage together as one in Him, and our commitment to raising Tucker to know and honor and love the Lord first, others second, and himself last.

In my last blog post, I mention "A Daddy's Prayer" where Todd wrote out his heart's desires and soul-felt prayer for our family, and the girls surprised me with it for the shower. So I wanted to share it with you today, on what has been the best and hardest day so far that I could have imagined. Reading it over and over reminds me how truly blessed, loved, and cared for I am, and how proud my own Daddy would definitely be of his son-in-law.

A Daddy's Prayer

"Dear Lord, I praise Your wonderful name for the exciting bundle of joy You have blessed us with. I thank you for the opportunity to pour out my life into someone else that is part of me. From the first time I heard Tucker's heartbeat, I knew he was a blessing from God. Thank you for entrusting us with one of your greatest gifts from Heaven.

I pray that You will provide me with the strength to accomplish whatever You put before me, courage to stand up for You and share Your Word, and compassion to show Your love to those of the world.

I pray that You will continue to bless Janice with the desire to be a great mother. Provide her with opportunities to pour out her love. Give her the wisdom and knowledge to take care of the gift You have given us. As she grows weary, provder her with the knowledge that You will always be there and will never leave. Provide confidence for her in times of need.

As we go throughout life, continue to open our eyes to the blessings You have bestowed upon us. Help our faith to grow even stronger and deeper. I pray that our marriage will mirror Your love for the church. Help us be a shining light in this sea of darkness.

Most of all, thank You for sending Your One and Only Son to live a perfectly sinless life and die for all my sins."

In loving memory of my father: 

Billy Edwin Barr

March 31, 1948 - March 26, 2005

We love and miss you so much!

More Showers of Blessings. March 16, 2013

March 16, 2013 seemed so far away when my sweet friend, Ashley Sims called me to schedule a date for a baby shower. I can't believe it's finally here! I am always excited to see my girlfriends, and just hang out with them. 

And I'm always super proud to have this very special friend, my mother, join me =) I talked about my mom in my last blog, but I just can't say enough how much she means to me, and how much I love her leadership, her faith, her positive outlook in everything, and her bubbly personality (wonder where mine comes from??? it's from her). I love that she's both my mother, and my best friend. She makes me very proud to be her daughter.

We picked up Todd's mom, and made our way to one of the most beautiful homes. My friend Suzanne, has hosted several showers and parties that Todd and I have been able to attend at her in-laws house. It is gorgeous, and always decorated to the nines. I mean DECORATED TO THE NINES!! She always has her beautiful crystal dishes set out for serving, table linens, and seasonally-appropriate decorations everywhere you turn. 

We had a fantastic brunch time meal, with muffuns, quiche, fresh fruit, oreo balls, spinach casserole, bagels, etc.

All complimented by your choice of orange juice, water, or fruit tea, served in mason jars with the most fun, gray and white swirled straws!! Classy elegance, and I LOVED it! Let me just add that I drank at least 3 jars of the fruit tea. Ashley Sims...I need that recipe ASAP! I actually had to take an intermission during gift opening because I was so full of fruit tea! 

This bouquet of flowers was perfectly made by none other than Ashley Sims!! Love her taste, her talent, and her spiritual gift for serving others. She went above and beyond the call today =)

More yumminess!! The strawberry banana jello salad is actually my mom's recipe and they made it for the shower! It was so delicious, just the way it always is when my mom makes it. Thank you girls!!

Tucker's name plate, made by Ashley Thornton!! I love it, and it is now sitting on one of his book shelves (new post coming soon!), among some of the cute books and stuffed animals we've collected. I'm not positive, but I believe the decorative plate was also written and displayed by Ashley Sims. "I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made" Psalm 139:14

This was the cutest idea, and a HUGE help after the shower was all said and done. They used one of our cloth diapers to hold blank envelopes. Each guest self-addressed an envelope. They were given to me along with a box filled with blank cards and card seals. I was able to write ALL of the thank you cards later that afternoon before going in to work. This is something I have done before for a friend's shower, but I had NO idea how much help it really is!! Thank you so much for your thoughtfulness in this regard! It blessed my socks off =)

More cute decorations! Suzanne's mother in law has it all! I'm telling you, she had the most adorable little baby carriages, and the girls filled them with all of our cloth diapers! Such a great display and decorative idea!

Ashley Sims may have tricked me a little for this. She had me send her some of our maternity photos to "maybe use for the invitations." Well, they ended up on these adorable chevron blocks, which are also now displayed in our new bookcase in Tucker's room. Such a sweet gesture. I must also make comment of the sunshiny, beautiful flowers!! Those were hand cut early this morning by Corey Hickman, husband to one of my dearest friends, Amanda, who also helped throw us such a wonderful shower =) We love the Hickmans!

Emily made these favors for everyone to take home. They are the cutest little "it's a boy" bags filled with hershey's kisses! She even bought the Easter holiday kisses, picked out all of the pink wrapped ones, ate them with her mom, then saved the blue, green, and silver ones for our little guys shower. I so would have done the same, Em =) I was given the left over baggies to take to the "next shower" where we will have LOTS of kiddos. Well, they made it about 3 days in our house, then we ate them ourselves!! Excellent favors...they hit the spot for daddy, mommy, and tucker!! HaHa!

Wow!!! So blessed and loved by my girls! We actually ended up moving all of the gifts to the outdoor covered patio. We were blessed with the most gorgeous, 72degree morning, with lots of sunshine and warmth! Perfect for a semi-outdoor shower.

More pictures from the mingling. I could have visited with my girls all day long. Some of them I hadn't seen in more than a year. It was so special to have them there!

I think Tiff is feeling baby Barton move here?? Or maybe she's just hungry (please refer to her most recent post http://tiffanybarton.wordpress.com) and see if you agree with me or not =) Love you, Tiffany!! Can't wait to do this for YOU and that sweet baby!!

More friends!! This shower was a mix of girls from our current bible fellowship class, previous bible fellowship class, my small group which I co-lead with Tiffany, SHBC choir, and our girl's bunco group. Lots of girls!!! Lots of conversation.

Left to Right around the table: Erin, Katie, Holly, Heather, Emily, and me.

Mommy-To-Be! That's probably my 2nd jar of fruit tea, half empty! Big smile on this girl's face though, and it's still there =)

Left to Right: Sarah, Jamie, and Danielle.

Traci and Tiffany...cutest sisters!!

Beth, Kristen, Jayne, and Anne Galloway, and Lynda Ellison were all there too! They aren't all pictured here, but I just love that family. They remind me so much of my own.....always having get togethers, family vacas, playing games, etc. I'm SO glad you all were able to come!!

In the far distance, you can see Ashley Sims, and she is holding a frame with "A Daddy's Prayer" which they TOTALLY surprised me with!! Ashley had asked Todd, at some previous time without me knowing, to write down his prayer for our family, his hopes and dreams of how the Lord will take care of us, and provide for us as a soon-to-be family of three. This will be my next blog post, if I can make it through it. Bring your kleenex people!!

This blessed my heart more than anything else that morning. I couldn't keep from crying, while being so filled with joy and love in my heart.

Sweet little Anna Kate was also at my shower. I love this little girl so much, and her mommy and daddy. They mean the world to us =)

She was too adorable. She wore the monogrammed scarf I gave Ashley (and all of the girls who hosted my shower), and stuffed her little baby doll up her dress so she would also be "a mommy to be." Love!

I have lots of pictures from the gift opening session, but I won't bore you with a bunch of them. This is one of my favorites though. Beth Galloway, who monogrammed all of the scarfs for me to give my hosts, also made this very special bin for Tucker. It was filled with several goodies, including two very special martial arts onesies she made. One of them read "Future Black Belt" and the other one "Just like Daddy". So special, and by far, Todd's favorite gift =) Thank you so much for your thoughtfulness, Beth, especially to include my wonderful husband. We received so many great gifts!! I had already categorized, organized, and put them away before I realized I hadn't made pictures of them. So, for now, I'll just plan to share them with you as they are worn, used, etc. 

Sara, me, Tiffany, and Brooke (who took all of my pictures for me). You Rock!! Thank you so much!! I know that isn't always an easy or fun task, but you did a great job!

Me and Holly, my small group buddy. Love her, and love her heart =)

Emily and me! Emily bought me the "Due in April" necklace that I'm wearing in this picture, and have worn every day since she gave it to me. Today, she gave me a new necklace with Tucker's initials on it. I want to wear it so bad, but I will wait til he's actually here. So thoughtful of my best friend. Love her sweet and kind heart too!!

Suzanne, Amanda, Ashley Sims, me (and a growing baby Tuck), and Ashley Thornton. These girls did a phenomenal job flooding us with love, thoughtfulness, yummy food and drinks, gifts, and more than anything, their huge hearts. I love you all so so so much, and am truly blessed to have you in my life. I can't wait to introduce baby Tucker to each of you and your sweet families.

Philippians 1:3 "I thank my God upon every remembrance of you."

Jack and Jules!! March 14, 2013.

Mom came up today to spend the weekend with us!! Yay! I always love when she comes. She's truly my best friend, and we have so much fun together!! We laugh a ton, and our conversations are endless. She made it into Knoxville around 9am, we made our to-do list, then hit the road. First stop: Jack and Jules Consignment sale!!

I was no rookie this time. I came prepared with my HUGE Ikea recycle bag! Ha!! I'm still impressed with the rubbermaid bins some of these women tote around! Well, with my mom right beside me, we had four arms, two very determined minds, plus an Ikea bag so big I could fit myself in it  :)

I will say however, that we were somewhat naive to the lengthy, lengthy, lengthy distance a single check-out line can be! I mean wrapped around the entire store, then weaved in between the carseats and strollers!! Goodness!! That's ok though, because it gave us an opportunity to look at everything on the outside aisles again!! It was meant to happen that way, and you'll see why very soon.

They had the most adorable rocking elephant I had ever seen!! I absolutely fell in love with him on our first venture through the toys section, and I wanted him (NEEDED him) for Tuck's room. But, I was hesitant to be the expectant mom who bought the rocking elephant! So, we grabbed this classic rocking horse, and I think he fits perfectly right there, between Tuck's crib and his changing table/dresser.

Having picked him up first thing, needless to say, he helped clear the rest of the aisles for us. I love you so much Mom, for toting him around in your arms and not setting him down even once for fear of someone snitching him away :) I'm not kidding. I wish you could have seen the bear hug she had on him the entire time. You don't mess with momma, and you certainly don't mess with the momma-to-be's momma!!! We had so much fun, and came out with these fun items for Tuck and his new room.....

....an adorable pair of build-a-bear puppies.... 

....a cowboy hat....

 .....but of course, a few more clothes for my little man....

....and yes, our rocking elephant!!! Yes Yes!! I actually picked him up and put him back down twice. I called Todd and asked his opinion, sent him a picture and everything. In the end, I could NOT leaving him sitting there. He had already stolen my heart.

I just love him!! He needed a little bit of surgery on his left ear, and his rear end and tail. I had to work that everning, and in between ER patients, I checked my phone and had this message from my mom. "baby elephant is out of surgery and doing fine" She fixed him for us!! Moms are the best. She knew that would have taken me forever, and he would have had a jacked up left ear and tail! Haha! Thank you Mom!! Tuck will love his elephant =)

Later this afternoon, we went through two huge rubbermaid bins sent from my sis-n-law, Collin, who has three boys. Although one was a summer baby, and two were winter babies, I was able to pull out two basket fulls of onesies, rompers, sleepers, shorts, pants, shirts, jackets, socks, hats, and hand mittens. Thank you so much, Collin! Can't wait to see baby Tuck in his cousin's little outfits (some of them I remember buying for Billy, who is now 6!!!) Time goes by so fast, so I am truly trying to live in every moment and enjoy every breath and heartbeat I'm blessed to have.

My mom brought us this very special gift for our shower this weekend, but couldn't wait to give it to us. Carhart overalls, a carhart polo onesie, and two of my favorite toys growing up 1-my puppy named Boomer, and 2-my "pull string farm sounds machine," (what I have always called it) which works just as great today as it did when I was 3!!

We had to stop at Kroger for a few groceries to get us through the rest of the weekend. While mom was picking out little Easter toys and animals for the grandkids, I found these cute cute rabbits for Tuck's room. If you haven't noticed, every stuffed animal has a mate. Todd said he wanted stuffed animals like for Noah's ark...two of every kind. So glad I found these! 

Lots more to come in the next few days!! Our next shower is Saturday, March 16th, and I can NOT wait!! Thanking and praising our Heavenly Father above for all of the many family and friends who have so generously blessed us and baby Tuck. We love you all so very much.

Tuck's Restoration Hardware: Part 3. March 2013.

My mom has made such a special contribution to Tuck's room, first with my papaw's leather recliner, and now with this dresser, which my mamaw originally bought for my mom and her sister when they were little girls. I just love that this dresser was in my mom's room growing up, and now it will be in Tuck's room. We saw great potential for this piece as well, and snagged it at the first offer. I drove down to Madisonville Thursday, March 7, to pick it up. No worries, my older brother Andy, helped me load it into the truck.

Todd and I knew we would have Friday at home together, and first thing that morning, we ate breakfast at Kitt's Cafe (my first time having breakfast there, and oh my goodness...it was DELICIOUS!!!!), then went to Lowes to pick out paint supplies...

and choose a paint color for the dresser.Why in the WORLD are there so many colors of paint?! We picked morning fog as our paint color. I'll let you determine when you see the finished product if you think it looks like morning fog or not.

Love him...he also bought all of our planters and seeds to grow our own organic vegetables at home! Yes, you guessed it...another blog post is soon to come =)

Morning Fog? I would say yes. We kept the original hardware, and originally thought we would distress it around the edges. However, after seeing it painted, we have decided to wait. What do you think?? Distress the edges and drawers? Or not?

I love comparison photos. Apologies that my pictures are a little blurry this time. I didn't notice until posting this blog, so I'll work on that, and I may even replace some of these if they continue to annoy me =)

Here it is in his room! I love it, and the more I sit in his chair and look it, the more I like it! Let us know what you think! It's a work in progress for sure, but slowly coming together. More pics to come!