I want to back up just a little and share the story of this most abundant blessing (and surprise). Todd and I have been married for 12 years now (2017), and have always had the mindset that we are so happy with whenever God decides to give us babies. We are the planners who don't really plan when it comes to pregnancy and adding to the family. Again, so incredibly thankful for His timing in all things, and for us it's just a way we can enjoy living and loving ;) without the stress or pressure of "trying."
All of that to say, we weren't planning for this, so we were QUITE pleasantly surprised when what felt like a case of really bad acid reflux (which I had never experienced in my life, but it literally put me in the bed, and I remember it feeling like lava boiling in my stomach!!!) turned into a positive pregnancy test!!! I honestly am one of the most in-tune-with-my-own-body kinda gals, and so I just knew this was one of those odd symptoms I just needed to experience this month. However, since we aren't planners, I often let symptoms like this make me question or think for a split-second that "I might be pregnant" and so of course that's just the silliest thing ever, and I'll just take a test to see the NO. Well, you know by now that a big ole fat YES popped up on that screen and within about 20 seconds...
I sat there, stunned, stoked, and so in awe of the reality of what that YES meant. A new baby. Another little one in the mix of our what we felt like was a seasoned family. A time-limit on our days as a family of three. Another beating heart. Ten more fingers. Ten more toes. Anothe rmoth to feed. Bottles to wash. Blankets to fold. Burp Cloths. Sleepless nights. But also so much love. Swaddling and snuggling. Baby breaths on my neck. Teeny diapers. Adorable outfits. Many more milestones and memories to be made. I think at least several minutes passed before I could move. I felt tears stream down my face and they were tears of complete joy because HE had planned all along for this little bundle of a blessing to join our family, and it wasn't our doing, it was all HIS. So I knew he or she would be the perfect fit whether I/we felt ready or not.
Having lost our very first baby at 11 weeks gestation, we waited until we were 16 weeks to announce Tucker's pregnancy, and this time we had two really good appointments with strong heartbeats of our precious baby on the way. We shared the news with our family first, and then with the rest of the world at 10 weeks, mostly because I was SICK AS STINK with this little love and this momma had to have some HELP!!
As I mentioned in my last blog post, every Sunday we have lunch with Grandad and Mimi, and so we found a "Grandkids are Special" picture frame and put the same picture (above) in it, and let them open it together as a gift from Tucker. Mimi pulled it out of the bag and looked at it, darted her eyes up at Todd, and said "are you trying to tell me something?" =) =) =) "Look, Pete (Grandad)..She shared the picture with Grandad and he darted his eyes straight at me for confirmation!!! We of course giggled and said YES!! Tuck's gonna be a big brother!!! Lots of grins, excitement, questions, and planning commenced =)
We went to Chattanooga to watch my brother's football team (Western Carolina University) play UTC, and although we didn't win the game, I pulled this framed picture out of my gym bag just before the coaches and team loaded the bus for the trip home. My brother Evan was like, awwwww that's a great picture... and my sister-in-law Rebecca GRABBED it and stared at it and screamed ARE YOU SERIOUS???!!?! Then Evan was like, what??? Wait a minute, what?? "She's pregnant!!!!"(Rebecca) "OH MY GOODNESS!!!" (Evan). It was the BEST!!! My mom, and also my older sister-in-law Collin and their boys were all there too. My mom squealed and cried of course, and hugged me so tight until I started to lose feeling in my arms ;) If there is one thing you should know (and probably already know) about my family, we love BIG and we love DEEP and we love HARD. I wouldn't want it any other way.
A couple weeks later, Todd and I spent the weekend in Cookeville, home of Tennessee Tech University where we first met, while he trained and tested for his Crossfit Level One Certification. He did a lot of studying and learning, and I did a lot of shopping!!!! ThirtyOne25 boutique is an absolute must stop shop if you are ever in Cookeville. Wife of the Crossfit fittest man on earth, Rich Froning (pictured with Todd), Hilary Froning and her sister started this boutique and they are just so fun and so lovely to be around. I think I spent more time chatting across the curtain from the fitting room with them than I did face to face, haha!! I found some super cute and trendy outfits that would also accomodate my growing baby bump!!! And can we just say, that bump SURE does pop out A LOT faster the second time around...and Ralph's Donuts (don't ever go to Cookeville without stopping in at Ralphs!!!!) didn't help, but were worth every single bite!!!!
As you can imagine, I took part in EVERY single sale Freshly Picked had to offer and started stocking up right away on moccassins for our baby on the way. I didn't discover this amazing brand of cuteness until Tuck was already walking, so we missed out on the newborn and itty bitty mocs with him. I bought mostly gender neutral shades and colors, but I had to get hot pink for our gender reveal...just in case. And that picture of Tuck will always be one of my favorites. It's such a perfect captured moment of his sweet and tender soul.
As soon as I learned I was expecting another baby, my time with this little one became even more precious and priceless to me. He loves helping me with anything and everything I am doing. Baking these cookies is one of his all-time favorites. Of course, eating them together is pretty fun too!! His eyes though...they look so much deeper than at what's just on the surface. They look deep into my heart and take my breath many times. My sweet little boy, I love this time with you more than words can ever say. What a blessing you are to me and your daddy, and to so many others. To the moon and back is not even enough to touch the amount of love we hold in our hearts for you!!
Day dates as a family became so much more of a priority (not that they weren't before, but just to a new level of fun and excitement) and teaching Tuck all the things he would need to know how to do once he's a big brother. Like hiking a football while holding a candy cane (as pictured)...
...and embracing the girly things in life, like high heels and necklaces, just in case he had a baby sister ;) I couldn't help but snag this picture of him walking around in mommy's heels!!! You can't see it, but he also has one of my necklace's around his little neck. Please note, he still has his moccassins on!!! =) Cutest little thing ever...
Date nights for mommy and daddy became a new priority as well. We had such a wonderful dinner at The Chop House, just thinking, planning, gazing at each other, and dreaming out loud over the excitement of this new bundle of joy on the way!!
Goodness, this man means so much to me!! Watching him as a Daddy to our sweet Tuck, and thinking about re-living those newborn and first few months of exhaustion all over again with this baby on the way seems so much more doable this time around because of him... and the wonderful helpmate he is to me. There is no one else on earth I would want to walk these steps with than him.
Christmas came and went faster than a blinking turn-light, probably because we found out our sweet baby is a GIRL!!! My mom already had a gift for her, which completely melted me!!! We had our anatomy ultrasound on Monday the week of Christmas, but WAITED until Christmas Eve morning (Friday) so that BOTH of our families could be present. We opened the envelope from the ultrasound, and saw a pink little sticky note saying, It's a Girl! =)
We absolutely would have been so happy either way, but oh how I have dreamed my whole life of having a daughter!!! I was on my knees literally in tears, completely blown away by the love and Sovereignty of our Heavenly Father in fulfulling one of my greatest heart's desires. Ephesians 3:20 has been one of my life-long favorite verses...and in these moments of so much love and joy and excitement, it rings loud and clear in my mind and my heart..."Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly more than anything we could as or imagine, according to His Power that is already at work within us."
It makes me want to relish in every single moment of life and every single breath given to me, realizing that the best present is to BE PRESENT and to honor Him in all things. Children are such a beautiful reminder of the wonderful grace of our Heavenly Father. I'm finding the more time I spend with them, the more I learn about Him ;) Thank you God for these most abundant blessings, and exceeding all of our expectations for how wonderful this life can be.
I wasn't lying when I said I participated in EVERY SINGLE SALE!!! My favorite thing about these shoes: they stay on. No matter what. No slipping off the heel. They stretch as their feet grow. Plus, I mean...how much cuter could they be??!?!? Our baby girl will undoubtedly have a shoe closet just like her mama!!
Our annual New Year's Eve trip to the Pancake Pantry is in the books!! It was COLD!!! But we ran into our dearest of friends, Corey and Amanda Hickman, and their two little ones, Benson and Amelia. They are without a doubt one of the sweetest families we know and they are solid in their faith, their convictions, their way of life, and their love for the Lord. I always love any time I have around them, and they make me want to be better. Those are the kind of people we should surround ourselves with daily.
Helloooooo baby!!!!! If you've ever had a conversation with me about babies and/or pregnancy, then you already know how much I LOVE PREGNANCY!!! I love everything about it. I especially love when you can TELL I'm pregnant (like here...) and when it doesn't just leave someone wondering if I've let myself go or I ate my own weight at breakfast that morning...hahaha!! We were 20 weeks along in this picture and after many many many names written on paper, scratched off, added again, we finally decided on her name... Julianna Marie Mills. There's just something about knowing her name that connects you on an even deeper level. So much love. So much joy.
Tuck helped us decide on her name, too. We were down to two names, and he loved Julianna. He also loves penguins and the movie Happy Feet, so we HAD to take his picture in front of Happy at Ripley's Aquarium. IF only I could share the video of his happy feet dance...it was PRECIOUS!!! Two and a half years old and melting my heart more and more by the day!
More day dates, because that's what you do as entrepreneurs... Enjoy time eating together at restaurants when no one else is there and it takes 20 minutes to prep and bring your food out, but it doesn't matter because you have the time to spare. Ive loved every single moment at home with these two and thank God every day for blessing us both with the opportunity to cherish these very early years with this little one...
...and our littlest one on the way...28 weeks!!! And this totally makes me miss my hair being LONG where I could just throw it up in a top knot and GO!!! I also miss it being dark a little. But here's the truth... all of my hair is GRAY, and so when you have it colored dark to match your natural roots, it only lasts like 3 weeks, maybe 4. THAT is not okay... gray follows blonde so much better. But I may just have to go dark again because the more I look at this picture.... (sigh)...
....so on to more important things, like Julianna's wardrobe!!! You guys, I could NOT stop shopping for this little love!!! Actually, I still have a hard time not swinging by the baby aisles every time I'm in Target or Marshall's... goodness this little one is just perfect!!! Navy and Gold... Stripes and Polka Dots... Ribbons and Bows... and Mocs!!! What more could you want?!?!? Besides her in it, of course =)
Yes, I continued to Crossfit 5 days a week all through pregnancy, and never missed a beat except for a few set backs and slacking lazy days in my first trimester when all I wanted to do was nap on the chalky gym floor. We have on matching shirts because we were teamed up for the Crossfit Open workouts, which I also completed (modified...don't you worry). I love feeling strong and powerful and I love lifting heavy things over my head!! If you've never tried Crossfit, no matter what your background is, I would highly recommend finding yourself a box in your town or city and getting connected. We will have our very own box one day... I have no doubt about it. God's timing ;) and I can't wait for that!!
3/10/16: We had the entire fort all to ourselves. Fort Kid. He was completely in Heaven...
...as were we... and it's extremely rare to see both mom AND dad at the park with their littles. Most of the time it's one parent or the other, but the beautiful gift of both us being entrepreneurs is the ability to create our own schedule and our own workload. Don't get me wrong, we both work diligently in our own businesses, just as we did in the corporate world. The difference is we can freely choose when we want to work and when we want to play (most of the time)... I can easily say it's not always easy to be disciplined, and its not easy to balance time, family, work, friends, littles, chores, etc. But one thing I'm learning (especially in these last few weeks) is that there isn't a "destination" or a "title" that will bring you joy. The joy is in the journey, and learning to balance this thing called life, parenthood, entrepreneurship, side jobs, etc. While I've had my ups and downs and curveballs thrown in the mix (don't we all??), I'm learning to choose joy =)
Joy in the highs and lows. Joy when its sunny or rainy, warm or cold. Joy when I can barely fit into my PANTS!!!! Joy. Because those snug-fitting pants are a perfect sign that this baby girl is growing and thriving in my very own womb. Pure Joy. How can I complain or worry or grumble about anything. Choose Joy, even when your pants are snug ;)
Joy in washing & drying clothes, and folding laundry...thinking of how BLESSED we are, and how much this sweet baby girl of ours has before she is even here!!! I've never loved doing laundry as much as I do now =)
3/27/16: We celebrated our 11th wedding anniversary weekend at Whitestone Bed and Breakfast, where we spent our wedding night. Grandad and Mimi watched Tuck for us the first night and then we met them the next day and let him come stay with us one night too. Sunday morning was Easter, so we all went to the Easter service together, then Grandad and Mimi drove out to meet us for brunch. (PS--Easter and Mother's Day Bruch at Whitestone is an absolute MUST for everyone, at least one time in their life--its out of this world amazing). What a perfect way to celebrate our hearts becoming one, our family of three growing to a family of four very soon, and the resurrection of our Lord and Savior....
...our sweetest baby boy Tuck, almost THREE years old... participated in an Easter Egg Hunt for the kids, and he was soooooo cute!!! He kept yelling, "I FOUND ONE!!!!!" As thankful as I am for this time we have had with him, I still wish I could just pause it every now and then and bottle up his little voice, his giggles, his belly laughs when we tickle him, and so many more things....
...I also want to bottle up these special moments and the little movements I feel with this precious baby girl. She's perfectly protected within me, and within my Heavenly Father's arms around me. We pray every day for you and your sweet big brother who is so beyond excited to meet you. We have your room ready, which you'll be sharing with Tuck and he CANT WAIT to "sleep in the same room as Julianna...", your closet is full, your cloth diapers are washed and ready, and we have more love than we could ever imagine in our hearts already for you, sweet baby girl. Not much longer.
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